Why Self-Discipline Matters More Than Being Intersting

Imagine two individuals with similar skills, knowledge and resources. Let’s call them Jane & Jill.

Jane always has something new and exciting going on. She talks about her goals with fiery enthusiasm. Sadly though, she always has a reason why she hasn’t gotten around to achieving them, quite yet.

Jill on the other hand achieves her goals, often without even bringing them up. Then she moves on to work on new ones.

I bet you know a few Janes and Jills.

Jane has the creative spark. She’s always full of new ideas, projects and possibilities. Jill has what I like to call “the backbone of success”.

You likely – instinctively know what it is. It’s that ability to control our impulses, emotions and behaviors to achieve what we want. The ability to resist the temptation of squandering our enthusiasm by telling all our friends about that groundbreaking idea and instead, breaking ground and getting it done.

It’s taking pleasure in the result of something tangible that we’ve built and completed, rather than celebrating before we’ve even started. It’s the inner game we must win to unlock our potential and reach your aspirations.

Yep, it’s self-discipline. It’s the ability to do the boring stuff, though we don’t feel like it.

Granted, Jane would probably make for more interesting and memorable party conversation, but Jill … is admirable.

And we all have a bit of Jane and a bit of Jill within us, don’t we? Some days we might lean more this way or that, but we’ve all been Jane and Jill.

Why Self-Discipline matters more than being interesting.

Every day, we make choices that either bring us closer to our goals or pull us further away from them. Developing self-discipline means making more of the choices that align with our long-term objectives.

In a world full of distractions, self-discipline allows us to stay focused and concentrate on our priorities.
Self-discipline boosts our resilience muscles and our ability to bounce back from setbacks. Most importantly:

Self-discipline is what allows us to develop into the person we dream of becoming.

So enough with the Pep-talk. If you’re still reading, you’re probably sold.

Practical strategies to master self-discipline

Don’t be too chatty about your goals:
Clear goals give us clarity on direction and purpose. But researchers have found that when you describe an ambition vividly, your body and mind get (almost) the same pleasure you would, if you actually achieve it. Over time, this leads us to loosing that drive and enthusiasm to actually get it done. Why bother doing something, if talking about it makes you feel just as good. (almost)! Gollwitzer (2009)
Nibble Don’t Bite:
Break goals into smaller, manageable tasks. Go micro tasks if you have to. It’s not about making it to the gym, it’s just getting your feet into your socks and trainers. Then take it from there. A step-by-step plan makes big goals less overwhelming, and research has shown that self-disciplined people seem to focus on the small steps to keep themselves going.
Eliminate Distractions:
Rather than searching for what inspires you, consider the opposite approach. Identify what distracts you and find ways to minimize or eliminate it.
Build Healthy Systems and Habits:
Establish routines that support your goals. Aim to make disciplined actions so natural that over time, you just do them without thinking.
Monitor Your Progress:
Regular review of your progress can be a great motivator, especially when the progress starts to accumulate exponentially. Compare where you are with how things were when you first started and cherish every step forward.
Reward Yourself:
Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small. Positive reinforcement encourages continued effort. Small frequent rewards could be more effective at reinforcing behavior than big rare awards.

You see, what Jill understands really well is, self-discipline is not about being harsh to yourself.

It’s about caring for yourself so deeply, you enjoy the present, but you also work towards a better future, for your future self.

Nobody has to hold you accountable, because your future self is doing that for you.

We live in a world that’s constantly seeking something new and exciting.

Yet, to achieve what you want from life you may need to work at your goals quietly, seeking pleasure in steady progress.
There may be times when you might not have an answer to that dreary party question: “So, what’s new with you?”
Instead, you might consciously choose to be less like Jane and more like Jill.